57 Shades of Pokémon GO

11:08 pm HelenLJohnson 0 Comments

  1. 1.  Pokémon GO is here!!!
  2. 2. Oh wait…I’m in the UK…
  3. 3. And, I’m not getting the APK, I’ll wait…
  4. 4. *cries*
  5. 5. The song ‘Pikachu’s Goodbye’ plays in the background.
  6. 6. IT’S HERE!
  7. 7. THIS IS MY CHILDHOOD DREAM!
  8. 8. Puts on some shorts, I like them because they are comfy.
  9. 9. *Wiggles*
  10. 10. Turns hat backwards.
  11. 11. Sets out to the theme tune.
  12. 12. I’m going to be the very best like no-one ever was.
  13. 13. DUM,DUM, DUM, DUM!
  14. 14. The fact that I am running away from Charmander breaks my heart.
  15. 15. I’ll always choose you in the Game Boy games little guy.
  16. 16. Where is this Pikachu?
  17. 17. Kotaku lied to me didn’t they?
  18. 18. Continues to walk, contemplates getting an iced latte from Costa.
  19. 19. IT’S A PIKACHU!!
  20. 20. GET IN MY BALL!
  21. 21. Runs across road.
  22. 22. YEEESSSS!
  23. 23. …. Now what?
  24. 24. Why does this game not tell me what to do?
  25. 25. I’m pressing menu screens, they don’t tell me much.
  26. 26. Right I am at a Pokéstop.
  27. 27. …Is something supposed to happen?
  28. 28. I see picture and a creepy amount of detail about the location.
  29. 29. Le spins.
  30. 30. Ohhh…
  31. 31. Carrying on.
  32. 32. I see no Pokémon.
  33. 33. *Buzzzz*
  34. 34. Tweet?…Oh…it’s a Ratatta!
  35. 35. Move to side Joey, this Ratatta is going to be in top percentage.
  36. 36. And there is nothing you can do to stop it.
  37. 37. 5 hours later…
  38. 38. 29 Pidgeys, 20 Ratattas, 8 Zubats and 1 token Eevee found in the crisp aisle of Tesco later.
  39. 39. Crawls into bed, realise that you needed to put an egg into an incubator to hatch.
  40. 40. *cries*
  41. 41. Wake up, back to training.
  42. 42. Check local gyms, realise that you are nowhere near the level to challenge.
  43. 43. Thinks a career as a Pokémon breeder might be more suitable.
  44. 44. Climbs into a bush for a Pidgeotto.
  45. 45. On way back, find a ten year old on a bike has just took over the gym.
  46. 46. *cries*
  47. 47. Give everyone knowing looks who are wandering aimlessly around town.
  48. 48. *Walks into wall*
  49. 49. Hope that no-one has seen…
  50. 50. That bloody ten year old gym leader saw and is laughing.
  51. 51. I’m so going to take over your gym, just you wait.
  52. 52. You won’t be laughing when my top percentage Ratatta comes to woop yo ass.
  53. 53. Or my Flareon, IF I CAN EVER FIND ANOTHER EEVEE TO GET CANDY.
  54. 54. Ends up getting lost.
  55. 55. Battery is dead.
  56. 56. I have no food or water.
  57. 57. This is the best thing ever.

0 comments :

Subscribe to: Post Comments ( Atom )